When something doesn’t go to plan. 

It’s been a rough couple of days. My running routine has gone out of the window because I didn’t listen to my body and I’ve managed to hurt myself. It’s time to heal up and hopefully I’ll be out on Sunday. The race I’m doing is next Sunday and I’m not filled with any amount of hope that I’ll be able to do it. At least not the way I want to. 

Last week I retired my penname. The name I write romance under. It wasn’t an easy decision to come to but it’s one I intend to stick to. It doesn’t mean I plan on giving up writing those kinds of stories. Far from it but now I will own it completely. 

New stories are hard to come by. I haven’t been feeling up to creating anything new for awhile. Running has been my escape. The thing I do to escape all the pain and heartache because if I’m thinking of putting one foot in front of other I’m not lingering on the pain. 

I’m not giving up though. One day I’ll write something new. Could be next week or next month that I’m hit with an awesome idea that won’t leave me until I get words on paper. I’m hoping its sooner rather than later. I miss writing. 

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A little bit of everything. 

It’s half term. For those people who are parents it means entertaining your little ones. This is also on top of everything you do when they are at school. A few things get left for a couple of weeks. Other things you try to enclued your child in. Since my dad died I started to run. It’s a way to quiet my mind and not to linger on all the things that make me sad. I’m signing up for a survival run, GEAR and my Race for Life number came through a few days ago. I went from being a girl who walked everywhere to a girl who laced up a pair of trainers and ran three to four times a week. That really boggled my mind. It boggles my mind more to realise I enjoy it. It’s hard but I get a real sense of achievement from it. Anyway back to the point. I have a routine and I can mostly keep at it even when Nathan’s not a school. This half term I’ve taken him on a few short runs, half a mile, at his pace. 

It’s been interesting. Unfortunately my son is more into his games. He has said that he’ll go out with me again, so maybe all isn’t lost. 

I haven’t been able to do photography but that’s something I hope to pick up again when he gets back to school. My dad left me his lenses. It would feel right to let them gather dust. 

There hasn’t been much time for writing either. I squeeze in editing when I can. Since everythings that happened I haven’t been able to get back into the swing of things. I talked to my dad about my stories and it’s not possible to find someone who did the same thing he did. Who I could talk to about anything and everything. 

Maybe I can update my page with new releases sooner rather than later. I do miss writing. 

A little off topic. 

I’m not the most prolific writer. Even when I wrote full time a few years ago, had to give up the day job at the time because a ruptured spinal disc and a bar job only went together in a world of ouch, I didn’t seem to accomplish much. Sure I wrote stories, mostly shorts or a novella but I hadnt found my stride, or my genre. For those who know me or the pen name I write under. I write multiple genres. It can get complicated entertaining the different muses vying for attention. Pick me. Pick me. Or destroying when none of them want anything to do with me. Quite a few times I’ve thought of retiring from a genre. I’m might still do that. I’ve been thinking about some of my old story ideas. The ones I came up with at college, the second time I went, not the first. The dreams that still haunt me. The thing is the stories under my own name don’t sell that well. Not as well as the ones under the pen name which is maybe a reason I’m finding it hard to retire her. She has fans, well some. I have people, a publisher, an editor and one fan that I really know of who likes the stories I publish under my own name. If hasn’t escaped my knowledge the irony of this moment, it’s a uphill battle and I’m currently walking up a hill (on my way to the day job). If I retire the penname it would give me more time to focus on building this brand. My back catologue. Maybe steampunk will come back into fashion. Maybe my paranormal adventure  will do really well. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. The only thing I can do is try and that’s the only thing we all can do. The only way we succeed is if we try. 

Thanks for visiting.